OFFICIALLY MISSING YOU

Leaving is pain. i always thought that pain is temporary. But as what I've experienced, it remains day by day. It gives me this scar, scar of missing you. Of longing for your side, of your comfort. It's been a long time, i know. But why can't I get over it? It is because of loneliness that I feel today? Cause whenever I'm all alone, you were always there to cheer me up. to help me with my problems. But now, you're gone. you're far away from me. We don't meet, we don't talk. i cannot even see you from a distance like i used to before. That's our past. PAST. It will never ever happen again. I'm only up with is the memories. Memories of the past. And I'm missing it. I really miss it. I can't seem to find someone like you. You're the only person who gave me this unusual feelings. And I'm missing it right now. I really do. RIGHT NOW.

INVISIBLE

                Here I am. Staring the one I love at a certain distance. Loving in silence. Dreaming of someday, I will be the reason of that smile. It’s nice to see that perfect little curve on your face. But the reason behind that smile kills me. Why can’t you see me? I’m always here for you. Ready to listen in whatever you want to say. I knew you for a very long time already. I know your likes and dislikes. The way you act around when alone and with a crowd. I almost knew everything about you. But why does it have to be her? Why not me? Every time you see her, pain struck me. You don’t know her. You don’t know how everything about her. Unlike me.  And I always end up thinking of how you’ll think of me and realize that you love me too. Am I that invisible? But I only wanted you. I don’t know why. There’s something in you I can’t resist. You’re just my everything and I’m just an INVISIBLE  person to you.

SECOND CHANCE

                I know it’s my fault. I’m the one to blame for what we are right now. I’m sorry I cannot think of any other way but to say that stupid words. I can’t get myself why I did do that. To break up with you. Leaving you in no particular reason. My anger dominated me. Maybe because of rumors that suddenly pops out after that incident. I felt so angry about what I’ve learned that’s why I did it. But I did not say that I fall out of love. I still love you, I really do. Every time I think about you, I can’t help blaming myself for letting you go in just a snap of a hand. I’m suffering great pain after that. My heart is yours and will only be yours. It’s hard to pretend I’m okay even if not. Every time I look at you, the pain I’ve felt comes over and over again. It’s like every day, its killing me. Are you offering second chances? Cause if you do, I’ll grab it. I want my life back. I want my heart back. If only you’ll give second chance.

DISTANCE

                Not having you by my side makes it harder for me to live. Knowing that you’ll be miles apart and thinking that I’m not going to see you every day, it’s a torture. But we can’t deny the fact that we must be apart. We must live different lives. I know it hurts. But we don’t have other choice. This is what destiny wants us to be. All I can say is I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the heartache. I hope I made you happy for the times when were together. I don’t know how to explain the pain I’m feeling. It’s a great depression for me for being away from you. I don’t know if my heart will make it through. It hurts a lot. I just hope you won’t hate me for what I did. I’m only thinking of everyone’s sake. And now distance will help me forget all of this. I’ll be leaving my life in the past and create my new chapter without you, being my man. Distance helps.

HATE THAT I LOVE YOU

                I just can’t understand what I’m feeling. I want to hate you for everything you’ve done to me. But in some certain of my life, I just can’t make it. Whenever you’re not around, I’m telling myself to hate you, to be angry with you. But when I look into your eyes, when you smile to me, all those thoughts are forgotten. I can’t stop myself from falling and falling again. Everything you did for me makes me want you more than I can imagine. It’s as simple as saying “you complete me.” And I hate it. Cause I’ll be needing you in my life and it’s gonna be hard for me to let you go. You’re the sweetest person I’d ever met. You know how to make me smile just because of your presence. You’re the only one who knows me like you do. And I hate it. I JUST HATE THAT I LOVE YOU SO.

BETTER MAN

                Every time you hurt your special someone, first thing na mawawala ay ang trust. Simpleng salita pero isa ito sa napakahirap i-maintain sa isang relationship. Kaya kahit sa isang pagkakamali lang masasaktan tayo. Dahil alam mo sa sarili mong baka saktan ka lang ulit. But not all people are like that. Not all men are stupid. Sometimes, they’ve realized that they really can’t leave without you and promised to change. But the question is, can you trust him again ? Can you risk your heart again ? well, give him another chance to prove that he can change because of you. That he will do everything just to win your heart again. At pag nakikita mo na nagiging better man na siya at andun pa rin ang love niyo sa isa’t isa, you can start all over again. Forget the heartaches he had caused you.

NEVER MIND

In my own perception, telling someone how you fell would be the bravest thing to do. Because not all people have mutual feelings. Hindi mo alam kung ano ang magiging reaksyon nila. And there is also a fear of being rejected. Lalo kung you’ve fall in love with your friend. Para sakin yun ang pinaka-worst na situation pagdating sa love. Yun bang hindi mo kayang i-sacrifice yung friendship niyo dahil lang na-inlove ka sa kanya. I know that there is a possibility of ruining the friendship that you build. At baka pag umamin naman, baka iwasan lang. That would be worst. Kaya ang tanging paraan ay ang pagtago nito. Cause it be better this way. Accepting the fact that your relationship couldn’t go any farther. Don’t mind your feelings and start treasure your friendship while you can still keep it. 

                “And I could tell you now but baby NEVER MIND.”